#WritingChallenge: 3-Sentence Pitch

By now if you’re participating in the Write Your Romance in 150 Days challenge, you’re one month in – that’s one-fifth of the way to the finish line, authors! – and thinking deeply about the essentials of your romance novel. What are the essentials? According to Love Inspired Editor Emily Rodmell in this post from our archive, they’re hooks, plot and conflict.

Whether you’re a pantser or a plotter, keeping these three things in mind will help you in the writing process, from making sure your character’s actions make sense to writing an engaging, original story that will captivate readers. As Emily says,” put those elements together and you’ve got your book in a nutshell, a short pitch that you can use to tempt editors, agents and readers. . . if your book has a defined plot and hooks (which every series romance novel should) it should be possible to share the essence of your story in a few sentences.”

Our challenge this week: Pitch your story in 1-3 sentences – max! We usually let entries go beyond suggested word length, but this time we challenge you to stay within the limits!

You can write a pitch for a novel you’re working on now, or for one of your finished manuscripts. Just be sure to include the hooks, the conflict, and something about the plot – in no more than three sentences.

Share your pitch in the comments below before Monday, August 7, 2017 and we’ll check back with you on Tuesday! Have a great weekend!

169 replies on “#WritingChallenge: 3-Sentence Pitch”

Widow Caroline Wright is suspicious when she meets a visiting stranger to her family’s island who seems a little too nice and a little too interested in her private affairs. Pretending to be a tourist, the laid-back stranger is billionaire Michael Matthew Marsden II, hotel resort entrepreneur and the man who hopes to buy Roger’s Island for personal use. If it takes a bit of trickery on his part, so be it—after all, his future happiness is at stake

Self-made billionaire Eli Celani has carried a vendetta against the wealthy Kincaid’s for eight years. Innocent Gina Kincaid has little to do with her overbearing family but when oh-so-sexy Eli launches a takeover of a start-up tech company and becomes her boss, she believes it’s part of his plan to destroy her family.

Gina tries to resist the sparks flying between them until one night their passion rages out of control and in the aftermath they must find a way to deal with the life-altering consequences – due in about nine months.

Self-made billionaire Eli Celani has carried a vendetta against the wealthy Kincaid’s for eight years. Innocent Gina Kincaid has little to do with her overbearing family but when oh-so-sexy Eli launches a takeover of a start-up tech company and becomes her boss, she believes it’s part of his plan to destroy her family.

Gina tries to resist the sparks flying between them until one night their passion rages out of control and in the aftermath they must find a way to deal with the life-altering consequences – due in about nine months.

So Sorry Chrissie, I somehow managed to post my pitch as a response to your pitch. I can’t seem to edit or delete it. 🙁 Red Face here
And I love your pitch, Chrissie! Would definitely read it.

That’s okay ALU, we’ve all done it before. Just hope they realize there are two of us in this post and comment on both. 🙂

Great pitch, Chrissie! Thanks for starting us off on this challenge. Your pitch is concise and I got a clear sense of the hooks, plot and conflict here. Nicely done!

ALU, also a great pitch. Again, you’ve been clear about hooks, plot and conflict while keeping it to three sentences — nice work!

Thank you, Katie! This is definitely my start of the “Write a book in 150 Days” challenge. Target Desire or maybe Special Edition. The characters haven’t shown me yet. 🙂

Romance-junkie Emmy’s latest literary hero, fish-out-of-water Tudor rake, Sir Jonathan Dalgliesh, magically comes to life. Now she must rewrite the cursed book imprisoning him each night, or The End will read Fatally Ever After. Lucky then, she’s no damsel in distress.

Hi Jeanna — this is a really intriguing premise! Interesting that it’s contemporary but still has some historical hooks. I’m curious about the romantic conflict here 🙂 Does it stem from her having to find a way to return him from whence he came?

According to Tristan Guthrie, Josie Douglas is most likely a corporate spy; hell bent on shuttering his factory. But the odds say she moved to Scotland with hundreds of millions in her pocket as she tries to fulfill a promise to her old boss while hiding from a former lover. Tristan reveals the truth and his desires as Josie learns to open her heart again.

Thanks for posting, Dianne! Sounds like there’s interesting conflict at play, as Tristan tries to discover what Josie’s really about 🙂

Brennan Judd fled New York City after witnessing a brutal murder, taking refuge at her family’s Montana ranch.
It soon becomes obvious that whoever is responsible for the violent crime has followed Brenna, thinking she knows more than she does, and is intent on silencing her forever.
To save herself and the people she loves, Brenna and Shep- the sexy, reformed bad-boy next door, have to find this madman and stop him before it’s too late.

Thanks so much!! I hope it was ok for me to jump in on these! This was my first post! 🙂

Of course! Everyone is welcomed and encouraged here! If ya don’t mind my asking, what genre do ya write?

This is a great group/site! I write a bit of everything but am currently obsessed with romantic suspense! What genre do you write?

I write Christian Romance Suspense ☺. I started doing these challenges a few months back, they’re a great way to get feedback from editors. As well as readers lol

That is wonderful!! Probably a dumb question, but how do you add the profile pic to your comments?

It’s called a gravitar, I don’t remember the site I went to to create mine but if ya google it go I’m sure you’ll find it ☺

Great pitch, Andie! Very clear hooks and plot here. Looks like there’s strong external conflict in tracking down Brenna’s tormentor. What’s keeping her and Shep apart emotionally? 🙂

Thank you for the kind words Katie! As far as the internal conflict, oh boy do they have it!
Between the two of them, Brenna and Shep have enough baggage to rival a Louis Vuitton store!
Shep had it all, he was a farm kid on his way. He was on a Division 1 football scholarship, he had met a girl who he had thought would be his wife and she was pregnant with his child. Life had been going just as planned until one night he lost it all along with his temper. He is now raising his daughter alone and rebuilding his life.
Brenna has always been a straight arrow. Bad boys never appealed to her- until now. Witnessing the horrific act of violence has her shaken to the core. While Shep is gorgeous and so sweet with his daughter, can she really trust a man with a past like his?

He could feel her hard nipples pressing into his chest. His hands strayed to her glorious rounded bottom pushing her against his shaft. Wait, she thought I don’t know you. He groweled into her mouth as she attempted to pull away from his searing kiss.

Hi Dorothy, thanks for posting! Is this the pitch you intended to post or the opening lines to the story? 🙂 Either way this seems like a steamy read!

Molly Ryan is twenty-five, single, and all about comfort in her hometown of Blackbird Hamlet, is pushed by her friends to meet men; especially newcomer Aiden Phillips, a single father who just needs quiet. A stubborn client, two- four year olds, interfering friends and family all attempt to help them find love. When a night of passion and unexpected pregnancy happens, can Molly and Phillip create a future of happiness?

Hi Callie – nicely done! This is concise, and I can find the hooks, plot and conflict. I was curious about why your H&H are resistant to love, even as friends (and the unexpected pregnancy!) push them together?

Hi Katie,
Thanks for your feedback, much appreciated.
Molly is all about comfort and sticking with whats in her bubble, and Aiden doesn’t want any drama because he is going through a divorce and full custody of his daughter. However, the more times, they are around each other, the more they start to like each other!

When Mi5 computer specialist Sadira Karimi finds out that her brother has been taken hostage in a war-torn country, she knows that she can only depend on the one man who seems intent on avoiding her. Sergeant Tom Morrison of the British SAS has been through hell and back with his job, but helping the sister of one of his best friends might just make the special forces soldier break his cold exterior. In a race against time, Sadira and Tom must strive to not only rescue her brother, but also unveil a potentially dangerous mole inside Britain’s counter-intelligence agency.

Nicole, what an intriguing story! This couple is up against quite a lot. I’m curious as to what’s keeping them apart romantically, and why Tom’s been avoiding her 🙂

Saleem is a world famous action movie star also a prince, who is at crossroads, his father wants him home to take his proper place and settle down.
Heather literally falls into his arms, having no idea who he is, and everything goes viral, she wants to kill the story, he wants her, and there is a stalker fan on the loose, also the fact of who he really is.
Two worlds collide, a prince and a commoner, can a real life fairy-tale come true?

Sounds like quite a story, Jan! I can see your hooks and plot, and how conflict would arise out of Saleem’s secret identity. Why does Heather want to kill the story initially and why would she be resistant to a relationship?

Honor Killing! Single Mother, Angel le Blanc prayed the threat was just that when the father of her child—a rapist—vowed to silence her forever if she revealed his identity, especially to Roham Aschad, the gentle man she’d once hoped to marry. But when a series of would-be assassins has Angel running for her life, trusting Roham, an undercover Special Agent with an explosive secret of his own, is something she must do if only to save her baby and, God willing, resurrect the dream of family they once shared.

Sounds like an action-packed story, Ann! Curious as to if/why Angel is hesitant to trust Roham — because she knows he has a secret, or perhaps other things from their past are at play 🙂

Thanks, Katie. Appreciate the commentary. Now to squeeze in that Roham accused Angel of playing him false after she fell pregnant.

Enjoy your week!

The safety of the pack rests on Charlotte’s shoulders; she hopes successfully completing her training will increase her fitness as head of pack security. The moment Zav, Charlotte’s training instructor, encounters her in the wood, at night, and in her wolf shape, he knows she will be his mate. How can he keep it professional during the weapons course, after tasting Charlotte’s kiss?

Great pitch, Yvonne! I can find the hooks, plot and conflict easily in your few sentences. Intrigued by your head-of-security heroine 🙂

While examining the ill horses at the local rodeo, Veterinarian Victoria discovers they’re bring drugged and now the drug cartel behind it is dead set on silencing her for good. She manages to escape them once with the help of the handsome, single dad, bronc buster, Justus and now the cartel isn’t only after her–they’re after them! Can they rely on their faith and each other to make it out of the Wyoming wilderness alive or will the storm or their dangerous pursuers claim them first?

Thanks so much, Tambra! *Hugs
Good Lord willing, I’ll have it finished by the end of the month and ready to be sent in by the end of September.
Prayers are wanted and greatly appreciated!

What a unique premise, Ruby! Lots of external conflict here — curious as to what’s keeping these two apart emotionally 🙂

Thanks, Katie!
To answer your question:
Victoria recently lost her fiance in a bull riding accident and she’s afraid to love another rodeo cowboy. Justus feels he failed his first wife and child after a horse accident claims his wife and permanently damages his sons leg. So he’s afraid to love another woman, afraid he’ll fail her too.

Shifter and B.I.D. agent, Grant MacGregor must find his daughter who was kidnapped by the wizard that killed her mother, but how do you track an incorporeal form who’s getting assistance from every dark living creature in the Celtic Underworld and beyond?
For the sake of his daughter, Grant is forced to accept help from the one female who stirs his heart, shifter and healer, Shandara Kerr.
Shandara swore she was through with males after her betrothed nearly killed her and now being on the run with this sexy shifter has her wishing for a second chance, which is crazy.

Intriguing premise, Tambra! I can see the paranormal hooks and plotline here, and the difficulties for Shandara. Curious about how this attraction is problematic for Grant 🙂

Abandoned at the altar Fallon Marsh tries keeping herself together. Instead of falling apart she packs a bag and jets off on her honeymoon. A chance meeting by the Little Mermaid Statue with Ryder Keats will change both their lives for better or for worse.

Thanks for posting, Charlotte! I can see some hooks and the general plot for this story but could’ve used a bit more on the conflict. Think: what’s the romantic obstacle for these two? 🙂

Millionaire restaurateur, Stefano De Lorenzi, is a traditionalist who wants an obedient, stay-at-home wife. Lucy De Lorenzi (Nee Green) dreams of becoming a chef and running one of the family’s restaurants in Tuscany. Despite their love for each other, their marriage can only survive if one of them backs down; the one thing neither is prepared to do.

Interesting conflict at play here, Jacqueline! I’m curious as to how the reader will come to understand this hero’s traditionalist desires 🙂

Just as Jessica Phillips swears off rich men, she meets oilman Blake Sanders, and her apparent lack of interest in him sharpens his determination to win her over. When he discovers she teaches classes in Marrying Up and Investing, he enthusiastically enrolls in both and their mutual attraction deepens; then Jessica is accused of insider-trading of his company. Will Blake believe in her innocence, or is once again Jessica doomed to see her dreams fall apart?

There are some great hooks here, Bev! I’m especially curious about Jessica’s past, and I always love a good conflict of interest.

Sadie Vanguard, 2100-year-old vampire, daughter of a prominent Senator, lives in a penthouse and is a V-Bay shopaholic with her biggest score – discounted blood.
At the head of a secret society is Garrick Dane, the great vampire warrior, who framed for murder is determined to prove his innocence and to save his race from the Vampire who trying to gain the throne.
Enlisting Sadie in the cause may be his worst idea yet since her father’s closest friend is the very vamp Garrick has pledged to stop.

I like the idea of Sadie getting pulled into a world of intrigue when she’d rather be shopping V-Bay! Is it her father, the senator, who wants to claim the throne? Is he a senator in the human world (I assume, as monarchies don’t have senates).

You can’t kill me, I’m already dead…

The vampire Dreck wants answers about his sire’s murder; Jordan, a battle-scarred slayer, questions her faith.

They cross paths in an underground fight club, lust soon turning to hate, but a common enemy leads to a shaky truce—even a renewed attraction—until one monstrous secret threatens their fragile spark.

Something I never get enough of in Nocturne are slayers! I always love a good slayer/vampire romance and this one sounds full of action and delicious tension. Great pitch here!

Brie Knight hates her job as VP of Grain foods, but she won’t let her half-brother down by quitting. For family, she’ll succeed no matter what. Unfortunately, her ex-lover and millionaire ex-baseball player Jordan Swift catches her off guard and now they’re engaged, undermining her professional credibility…and risking her heart and soul.

There are some great hooks here, Isabella. A high-powered heroine who will do anything for her family is someone we can all root for. I’m curious as to how her ex is threatening her professional credibility!

For a girl who got seasick stepping across a puddle, the idea of sailing to Bermuda on a cruise ship was as tempting as a day-old cup of coffee, but Ross, the gorgeous new guy in her apartment building had signed on as a magician and now two days before sailing, his assistant had broken her wrist. Maralee could not resist his pleas, not to mention his beautiful flirting eyes. But now as she packed her duffle, she worried how Grayson, her fiancé, would react when he heard her plans.

Dorothy, I love this. Seasick, last-minute magician’s assistant is something I have never seen before, and it just sounds like so much fun. And she has a fiancé on top of that? Give me more!

Thanks Katie! I have about 700 words written at this point. Would you like to see it? I’m a bit new at this kind of submitting. Could you tell me where to send it?

As for more…

Grayson is furious, but doesn’t want to deny Marlalee the chance to have fun, so he agrees she can go. As the Cruise continues, Maralee’s enjoyment is overshadowed by bouts of seasickness and guilt over her developing feelings for Ross. Meanwhile, Grayson is having his own troubles back in New York.

When hockey star Royd Grainger finds his ex-wife working in a bar, he wants to find out what’s happening to the money he sends her every month. That’s when he discovers they’re still married. In seventeen weeks they can have a new divorce, if they can just ignore how much the time apart has increased their attraction to each other.

I am very intrigued by this story. What is happening to the money? Is she saving up for something, do they have children together, what is their story?

I think this is a little better:
When hockey star Royd Grainger finds his ex-wife working in a bar, he wants to find out what’s happening to the money he sends her every month. That’s when he discovers they’re still married. In seventeen weeks they can have a new divorce, if they can just remember why they wanted the divorce to begin with.

Plot defintely has me intrigued – and you can never go wrong w a hockey player as the hero. Hot! 😉

The world needs more hockey romances, Anne, so I’m delighted to see this. What is happening to the money he sends every month? It’s very intriguing, and as an ex-bartender myself I love a blue-collar heroine.

How do you ask a complete stranger for a DNA sample from her daughter? Business magnate Nathan Thorson had a plan, and he wasn’t about to let something as indefinite as personal morals stand in his way, if the child was his he had a right to know. Child advocate Felicity Matthews had no qualms adopting her deceased friend’s daughter, not only was it the right thing to do, she got the daughter she always wanted without the mess of being in a relationship.

Found-family is a trope very dear to my heart, Kate, so I’m all in at the idea of Felicity adopting her deceased friend’s daughter! I wonder what kind of tension could arise between her and Nathan…

Thanks for your response Kayla.
Sorry I didn’t lay out the tension more definitively. I’ll do better next time.

Ten years ago, Mason Bishop left Lauren Campbell – the girl he loved, but didn’t feel he deserved – and their small town, clearing the field for his best friend who’d saved Mason’s life in high school. Now a law enforcement widow, Lauren has returned and needs DEA agent Bishop’s help when she stumbles upon dangerous opioid traffickers. Can she forgive Mason enough to trust him with her heart, her life, and the life of the son he doesn’t know he has?

This sounds like a fabulous romantic suspense, Jocelyn. I always wonder about heroes who don’t feel they deserve the heroine – why does Mason feel this way? And it never hurts to throw in a secret baby!

Single FBI Agent Desiree Watkins is cooling her stiletto heels on desk duty after a work related injury. She is a little gun shy, especially around her superior, enigmatic and guarded Dominic Pirelli, who has some secrets of his own
When Grace, the infant daughter of a young couple she befriended, is kidnapped, Desiree and Dominic join forces to find her before time runs out. And maybe Desiree and Dom will find the grace they are both seek.

I’m always interested in knowing the background and histories of FBI Agents, since they’ve usually been around the block a couple times when we first meet them in a romantic suspense. How does Desiree know the young couple, and how was she injured? And what secrets is Dom hiding? And how can they possibly trust each other if they can’t communicate? This is why I love this genre.

New York billionaire and commitment-phobe Alex Darcy needs a nanny, a fiancée and a better reputation, by Christmas. Gossip columnist and English-aristocrat-in-hiding Tilda Vallance needs money to support her son. When Tilda reluctantly agrees to a fake engagement for a million dollars, their mutual attraction explodes, but can Tilda learn ever to trust and how will Alex react when Tilda’s secrets are revealed?

Yes, a holiday romance! Even better, a metropolitan one. Sophia, you have some of my very favorite hooks in here, including the fake-it-till-you-make-it relationship. What is Tilda hiding? I would read this in a heartbeat.

Sales Associate Lisa James is being stalked by her abusive ex-husband. Police Officer Brent McCarthy is determined to protect the woman he’s falling in love with. Lisa may be able to trust Brent with her life,but can she trust him with her heart?

You have some very classic hooks here, Sarah! I wonder about the ex-husband, and maybe there’s a way to up the stakes even more? Lisa definitely has both internal and external conflicts apparent here, but what about Officer McCarthy? What could he be struggling with?

The woman jogging down the road that Nik Serrano passed looked shockingly familiar! When Addie Carrick learns the identity of her new neighbor her heart stops, he is the hotel magnate that her former fiance had tried to swindle out of millions. Nik had seen her in the past and can’t take his eyes off her now, with seduction in mind he hopes she will be his next conquest.

I love that Addie’s former fiancé almost ruined Nik. That’s such a fun and interesting conflict that I feel like I haven’t really seen much of before. And it leaves us to wonder – is Nik’s seduction pure, or is it revenge?

Becca’s life consists of juggling an insecure ex-husband, two sons and her technology company. When her mother’s failing health calls her out of the city and back to her country roots, fate is tempted when she runs into her teenage crush who is deaf. She asks him to partner with her on a new smartphone app for deaf people.

Returning to roots is a fave of mine, Skiffer! So naturally I’m already on board with this pitch, and I’m also pleased to see a second chance romance in the form of a deaf hero, which we haven’t seen a lot of!

With two dead fiancés to her credit, Miss Clarissa Scott is determined to ensure that her third fiancé makes it to the altar alive. Her 21st birthday is fast approaching and she will lose the family inheritance if he doesn’t. Only the Duke of Bedford, her current fiancé, is hiding a secret. He’s only proposed in order to find out who’s murdering his friends and why.

Hi Margaret
This sounds like a great plot. I just wanted to let you know there is an actual, real life Duke of Bedford (and has been since the early Tudor age) so you might want to choose a different name/or a defunct peerage. I do like the synopsis though. 🙂 (Sorry if I seem officious.)

Thanks everyone for your comments and hmmm…on the slip up with the Duke of Bedford maybe my muse is telling me to set this in Tudor times…thinking cap is on 🙂

So much to love here, Margaret. A fiancé with ulterior motives, a heroine with a trail of bodies…and a historical on top of that! I want to read this one right now!

After a devastating betrayal and subsequent divorce, Elise had worked hard to piece herself back together and finally achieve her dream of owning her own bridal salon and the precious independence it affords. It’s an independence she guards as zealously and carefully as she does her own heart. But when the man behind a takeover threatening her beloved business turns out to be the first love she walked away from twelve years ago to chase those dreams – a man that still had the power to ignite her temper and passion in equal measure – she is in danger of losing both.

Chantelle, You definitely have some great hooks here with the reunion romance and two people in an adversarial position. I would put those two things up front more than anything (her divorce). Well done overall!

Chanel is set to wed her first-love, Eric, within three months. A brief separation caused by infidelity caused her to find solace in the last person she ever thought to seek- Eric’s older cousin, Kendall. With new feelings brewing for Kendall, Chanel finds herself torn between something old or something new.

Oooh, I like this. It seems more like a longer story and not really a traditional romance (because of third party/even fourth party) with lots of angst and choices between love and obligation.

After a tumultuous freshmen year, Kyla is not amused by her parents decision to send her to a retreat for troubled youth in rural Alaska. Once there, not only does Kyla fall in love with the land, but there are two very handsome and very different boys vying for her attention. Halfway through the summer, her bliss is interrupted when an oil company moves in on the land , threatening to drill, and they must all bond together to save their wild paradise.

I am also somewhere where it is still August 6th – bet you can’t guess where

Let me guess, Hawaii? In any case, judging from the ages of these characters, perhaps this is a YA romance? Or New Adult? I wasn’t sure if it was a romance or broader scope fiction. I would caution against adding too much suspense when the juicy relationships between these characters might be the most interesting part. Best of luck!

Ms. Bloom, thank you for your input! Yes, I was shooting for YA Romance. I will work on tightening up the story line and focusing more on the relationships.

After a series ofaccidents, bakery assistant Alexa Chandler is suspicious when her mentor’s death is ruled a suicide. Undercover NCIS agent Spencer London is assigned to investigate the death of bakery owner and Culinary Specialist 1st Class Dylan Tyler. Misleading evidence makes Alexa the primary suspect and tension sparks between the duo . . . can Spencer find the killer before Alexa becomes the next victim?

Dear Caitlin, I have to say, I have a special love of stories that center on bakeries. Nicely done and I like how you bring in suspense Just as long as nothing ruins a batch of cupcakes!

When her date is arrested, financial wizard, Alice McGuire, suspects something more is going on when the police bring her in. The cop who interviews her doesn’t trust her, but he’s convinced that she can help him trace money missing from online bank accounts. All he wants is an introduction to the man she was meeting, what he doesn’t say is that it will be impossible to keep her identity secret or that putting her in danger is breaking his heart.

Piper Harrington, a renowned architect at the height of her career, ensured that, Vittore Leone hired her for his building project. The Italian billionaire had ruthlessly crushed her father’s business and destroyed everything he had worked hard for. Now it was her turn to make him pay, only her heart had designs on something much stronger than revenge.

Kathryn, I have just realized that I have somehow posted my pitch within your space. Please accept my apologies. 🙂 xoxoxo

Nice, Kathryn! I like that the heroine is a financial wizard and I think you lay out the crux of the story nicely. Well done!

Thank you Patience for the comments, they are helpful to me in moving my writing forward and much appreciated.
Calida, thanks for the nice comment.

In a sleepy little college town, Professor Ariel Summers hungers for two things: her freedom, and the excitement of a man who doesn’t think lecturing her is the most seductive of aphrodisiacs. Driven to the city on one of the few nights before her sleepy little town returns back to being party central, she drowns her sorrows in a bottle of Mick’s sweet whisky. It is in Mick’s bar where her two worlds collide when she runs into young Logan Winters, and finds that he is hell bent on showing her the pleasure that can be had when she releases that infamous control and surrenders.

-This is meant to be an erotic short for the Carina Press line

Well done, Savannah. What I would suggest is shortening this pitch just a touch and bring up the younger man/professor theme a bit sooner. I can definitely see this as a seductive short, or even a longer story with plenty of angst (and other things :))

Sorry this is last minute. I been stomped. So here goes:
I have to stay crazy in order to stay sane. Michelle said to herself as she contemplated her next move.
There was only one shot at getting out.
“Miss Mitchell! Time for your special medicine!” Michelle turned away from the window to face the nurse that was preparing to administer the shot. One chance to break free. Before the nurse could give the shot Michelle attacked her and ran like her life depended on it.

Amber Lacey has spent the last six months wrestling with New York authorities to be allowed adopt her dead sisters daughter. She’s finally returned to London, landed herself a job and is about to meet her new boss, the millionaire tech enrepreneur, Johnathan Ascot. She should hate him, she knows she should, but she’s instantly drawn to him – but how and when will she tell him that he’s her adopted daughters father?

Slam dunk, Sophia! Well done! This is full of hooks, strong characters and quite a conundrum.

Kind of messed mine up when I redid it so this might be a better version maybe:

“I have to stay crazy to stay sane. Michelle said to herself as she contemplated her next move.
There was one way out of this hell hole and she was bound to do anything necessary to leave and find her brother’s killer.
Miss Michelle! Its time for your ” special” medicine! Michelle smiled knowing that this was her chance and she grabbed the nurse and shoved him to the floor.
“Get me out of here now or so help me…..

Dear Lakisha, I love the idea that the heroine is captive somehow and has to escape. I might suggest, though, that you write a more straightforward pitch and not try to plunge us into the actual story just yet. But intriguing idea just the same!

Fugitive Recovery Agent Autumn Behounek gladly takes on the job of hunting down the worthless ex-husband who left her broken and alone when he jumps bail, but things get serious when a new warrant is issued on him for the murder of a local District Attorney and Detective Chase Lane gets in the way of her hunt and her determinedly single status. As they begin to uncover the plot to frame Autumn’s ex, Jake, she not only has to protect her heart from the charm of playboy Detective Lane but her life as well.

Quite interesting story here. I like how the ex seems to be escalating in his crimes and that the heroine has to trust the hero with protecting her and with her heart. Nice!

Desperate to conceive an heir and secure her place in the palace, sexually inexperienced Queen Margaret accepts her mother’s proposal to entertain different lovers from the aging and nearly impotent King’s bloodline to better the odds. The plan is dangerous enough, but when the King’s nephew, Lord Brandon, steals Margaret’s heart, the two begin a dangerous affair that could see them both beheaded. Is there any hope of a happy ending when the fate of a nation’s ruling household stands between them?

Dear Melanie, I love the kind of story where a character falls in love with the “wrong” person, though I would watch how gruesome the consequences could be. The threat of beheading is bit too frightening for a romance novel. And I wondered that if the heroine falls in love with the nephew, isn’t that still in the bloodline? Otherwise, a fascinating idea.

“Rafe, help me.” Rafe Hermann gets this call one dark Texas night. Rafe’s response is immediate because he has a weakness for this young single mother and her baby girl. Rafe saves Karinne, but for the small town Texas farmer the ominous incidents including vandalism, murder and kidnapping of baby Tessa test the Rafe’s courage, strength and dedication and most of all his relationship with Karinne.

This has the potential to be quite heartwarming with the budding family coming together during dangerous times. I would consider bringing out more what makes the heroine special and strong.

Tillie, stranded at midnight on a gravel road still five miles from home, stops at a neighbor’s farm , discovers he’s been murdered, and finds herself fleeing for her life. Tillie’s subsequent rescue by the new Sheriff Logan Murdoch is the first of her near escapes. In tiny Kirland, Texas nothing ever happens, but Tillie finds that between them she and Logan can trap the murderer.

Dear Jeanne-Anne, Lots of suspense here, and the real creepy kind. I adore this kind of story, though I would caution having a non-law-enforcement heroine working on the case, unless she has some training or a family member involved.

Tycoon, Daniel Wilson is sent to a small town to convince owner Nicole Taylor to sell her bakery to Wilson Enterprises. His father and boss, Daniel Wilson Sr. believes that “Sweet Treats” would be a household name , but Nicole refuses to budge. His father, however, believes with a bit of persuasion and Wilson charm, she’ll accept the multimillion dollar offer. Daniel Wilson Jr. isn’t convinced that Nicole Taylor would cave, he knows her all too well because he broke her heart six years ago after ditching her an hour before there elopement at a Vegas chapel. In fact, he didn’t tell her he was on his jet back to Canada while she was receiving a massage at the spa.

Wow! This story ends on a real cliffhanger. I want to know why the hero left the heroine at the altar and not just to catch a plane. Why did he need to catch a plane? In any case, this seems like a fun story with lots of reasons why the hero and heroine should have some friction! Well done.

ALU, also a great pitch. Again, you’ve been clear about hooks, plot and conflict while keeping it to three sentences — nice work!

I realize I am posting this past the deadline, but I would appreciate feedback if possible. Thank you.
Sara, a young widow, has her sites firmly focused on the future: raising her young daughter Maddie, and going back to college. Romance is the last thing on her mind until the handsome and caring Jacob sits behind her in business class. With Sara harboring a health secret and Jacob leaving town to care for his mother, do these two have a chance at love?

Seva falls into a deep sleep, only to awaken 200 years later in a small fishing village in Scotland. Confusion and fear come in waves – Her heart beats irregularly to the point of pain, her memory is gone and nothing or no one seems familiar. It is only after she is taken in by a local man and his Mother does she find the strength to draw out memories locked away for too long – her fractured heart is caught between two worlds – the one she ran from and this one, where love waits.

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